Today I rise...
Because yesterday was a very low day for me. I was really stressed about the move, about my mom not organizing any of her things so that I can move easily to grandma's and about having to find a new sitter. So while at my grandmother's, myself, baby mi mi, Mr. Man, mom and grandma were all watching the Olympics when I just had a Breakdown. I just started crying extremely hard, and the baby got scared, she came over and hugged me and and then started crying also. So I pulled it together, because I didn't want her to worry about me. That hurt the very most. At that moment though I was just so overwhelmed. While at work during the day, my attitude was just bad, I was angry, the friend who I am always contemplating our actual friendship we had a tiff and it was just rough. But while I was at lunch, I was reading my book A Return to Love and began to put somethings in perspective. (Even though I still had a breakdown after work) But this is what I wrote while on my lunch break
Because yesterday was a very low day for me. I was really stressed about the move, about my mom not organizing any of her things so that I can move easily to grandma's and about having to find a new sitter. So while at my grandmother's, myself, baby mi mi, Mr. Man, mom and grandma were all watching the Olympics when I just had a Breakdown. I just started crying extremely hard, and the baby got scared, she came over and hugged me and and then started crying also. So I pulled it together, because I didn't want her to worry about me. That hurt the very most. At that moment though I was just so overwhelmed. While at work during the day, my attitude was just bad, I was angry, the friend who I am always contemplating our actual friendship we had a tiff and it was just rough. But while I was at lunch, I was reading my book A Return to Love and began to put somethings in perspective. (Even though I still had a breakdown after work) But this is what I wrote while on my lunch break
LUNCH BREAK Titled: A breakdown to breakthrough
Today I was really stressed and sad about all that's going on. The move, the foreclosure, my grandmother's house and needing to find a babysitter. It's just so much going on and while reading my book I came to part that discusses SURRENDER. In this section she talks about how the more we try to control everything the harder it is for anything to change or occur in those sittuations. What we need to do is to surrender and let God take care of it all, and to have faith in him. Then I started thinking about how I am trying so hard to control what's going to happen with this foreclosure. Everynight I am online for hours trying to figure out life after foreclosure, how to survivie it, yadda yadda yadda, and to no avail. and I just came to a realization. No story, even if I could find one would be MY STORY. because everyone's experience is different and then I remembered that is why I started this blog!! I want to share MY STORY. Not to try to say to everyone what will happen to me in this sittuation will happen to them, but just to give people an outlook from my eyes. And after thinking about it, I am honestly glad my searches left me empty handed because knowing me if I would have found a step by step guide, I would have followed it, to the T. If it said Bankruptcy was the only option I would have said yep that's right for me. But in my eyes, that's not. I want that to be my last option, and I will go kicking and screaming, scrimping and saving for as long as i can till I have to get to that point. So as of today I will no longer google "surviving foreclosure I will only be living and reading my own story. A SURVIVOR OF FORECLOSURE.
Mi$$
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